Saturday, May 05, 2012

End of the World??

Apparently, on 5/May/2012 we will have a super-Moon which is when the Moon is closest to the Earth. The Moon is Earth's closest satellite.This is an ideal time for alien forces to attack and launch Operation Liberate Earth. This may astound you. But, think back. They have been preparing this moment for years. 

By carefully feeding so called 'reality shows', which are nothing more than extra-terrestial propaganda explaining how wonderful life will be under their tutilage, we have grown accustomed to strange and unusual practices. These shows will allow the invaders to land unchallenged and take their rightful positions of authority. Thanks to our reality show conditioning we will not notice. They have already made a few select attempts in the past. For example, in Italy the  Venutians deployed their agent Berlusconi to masquarade as the First Minister. They would have succeeded if they had been a little more patient and not subjected the Italian populus to full-on Venutian life-style so early. The dimiutive French President Sarkozy who hails from Jupiter where the gravity results in people of short stature (on his home planet Sarkozy is considered a giant) has been partially successful in promoting Jupiterian practices. Although the current round of elections hint that the French are not fully aclimatised to the Jupiterian code. 

The Martian forces have had more success with the re-affirmation of their agent BorisJohnson as the rightful leader of London. She (on Mars BorisJohnson is considered a mata-hari like figure) is now in place to institute more alien practices to make the city and thus country habitable for the invading forces.

What can we do?

The clue actually comes from the UK where the Government (infiltrated with Martian and Mercurian agents) has placed a heavy tax on pasties (partially edible pies filled with meats that are currently banned by the Geneva Convention in most countries). Pasties are known to be highly toxic to extra-terrestial life-forms. The mere smell of a hot pasty is enough to bring down an elite platoon of alien troops. By launching satellites filled with microwaves that are able to deploy hot pasties in a protective ring around the Earth we will be able to neutralise the alien threat.

Strategic placement of hot pasties at Government and other high-level leadership organisations will help to root-out the alien agents and restore normality to Earth.